7.6.2003

Rules Of Work

1. Never give me work in the morning.  Always wait until 4:00 and then bring it to me.  The challenge of a deadline is refreshing.
2. If it is really a rush job, run in and interrupt me every 10 minutes to inquire how it is going.  That helps.  Even better, hover behind me, and advise me at every keystroke.
3. Always leave without telling anyone where you are going.  It gives me a chance to be creative when someone asks where you are.
4. If my arms are full of papers, boxes, books or supplies, do not open the door for me.  I need to learn how to function as a paraplegic and opening doors with no arms is good training in case I should ever be injured and lose all use of my limbs.
5. If you give me more than one job to do, do not tell me which is priority.  I am psychic.
6. Do your best to keep me late.  I adore this office and really have nowhere to go or anything to do. I have no life beyond work.
7. If a job I do pleases you, keep it a secret.  If that gets out, it could mean a promotion.
8. If you do not like my work, tell everyone.  I like my name to be popular in conversations.  I was born to be whipped.
9. If you have special instructions for a job, do not write them down.  In fact, save them until the job is almost done.  No use confusing me with useful information.
10. Never introduce me to the people you are with. I have no right to know anything.  In the corporate food chain, I am plankton.  When you refer to them later, my shrewd deductions will identify them.
11. Be nice to me only when the job I am doing for you could really change your life and send you straight to manager's hell.
12. Tell me all your little problems.  No one else has any and it is nice to know someone is less fortunate. I especially like the story about having to pay so many taxes on the bonus check you received for being such a good manager.
13. Wait until my yearly review and THEN tell me what my goals SHOULD have been.  Give me a mediocre performance rating with a cost of living increase. I am not here for the money anyway.

The Rules from a JobFairy.com Perspective

What are the common misperceptions about The Rules?
S.J. Gilman, in her book, Kiss My Tiara, trashes The Rules as too focused on "trading a diamond for your hymen". While this is a gross oversimplification, if this is the perception, then it is wildly inaccurate. There is also a perception on her part, and on the part of others, that The Rules could not possibly apply to non-heterosexual women. This is also incorrect. In fact, The Rules can be said to apply to any gender of human being, of any orientation.

Why do you need The Rules?
The Rules are an easy and efficient method of implementing boundaries in relationships without imposing behavioral change on anyone other than yourself. Translated to an environment that encompasses more than just dating, they are a non-confrontational and unselfish method of pursuing your agenda. The Rules are all about fulfilling your own needs in a way that does not come at the expense of others. They are also an excellent method of taking back your power from what has always been a male-dominated construct. Lastly, they optimize behaviors for maximum efficiency. Women often suffer from wishful thinking; to those who are not in technical fields, the concept of IF/THEN, i.e. IF a certain event happens, THEN I will do "X"; IF a certain event does not happen by a certain time, THEN I will do "Y" - can be foreign to their training and experience. The Rules help women to whom these thought patterns are not yet innate to insert such consequence triggers into the algorithms of their thinking.

How does this apply to the JobFairy.com philosophy?
We provide this translation and incorporate it into our philosophical underpinnings, which include the works of Hochheiser, de Becker, and others. Based on our research, Fein and Schneider may not even realize why The Rules work as well as they do for non-dating situations. Here at JobFairy.com, we have found that an essential part of success is taking back and reclaiming your power. Learning how to focus your energies, using your time and emotional capital in the most efficient way, and to set effective boundaries within your relationships can only benefit you.

How does our analysis of The Rules help you achieve your goals?
Each week, we will provide a commentary on a particular Rule, as has been done for the 36 principles of the Art of War. (Is it sheer coincidence that there are 36 Rules within each of the first two books?) You can draw from the real-life anecdotes and commentary insight as to how to apply the Rule in a context other than dating. You will see how the fundamental principles of The Rules pertain to your work environment and relationships.

Will JobFairy.com make a list of all The Rules available?
No, you will need to have the books in order to follow along. You can find them on amazon.com by following these links:
·  Buy The Rules - book number one
·  Buy The Rules II - book number two
These series of articles are to serve as critical analysis that are meant to be able to help you interpret The Rules from a JobFairy.com perspective. They are not intended to replace or supplant the text of the book; they are commentary. In order to get the most out these critiques, you must first read the book in its entirety. Then reread each chapter in conjunction with the new article each week. The first in this series of articles will appear starting July 6th. We hope you will enjoy studying The Rules from the Job Fairy perspective.