12.1.2002
Jobless Pros Rip "Skills Gap" @ http://www.eweek.com/article2/0,3959,1994,00.asp
"Impossible skills demands. Feeling not only burned but also now in the supply-and-demand driver's seat, many employers are requiring almost ridiculously specific experience levels and skill sets when posting job openings. And they're unwilling to accept anything short of the perfect candidate. One IT pro I heard from said she saw a job posting that asked for six years of Java, C/C++ and XML experience. Problem is, Java is barely 6 years old, and XML is not yet 6 years old. So is the skills gap real? I guess so, if what you're looking for doesn't exist." - Jeff Moad on eweek.com
How to Get Around the Latest Recruiting Silliness
The latest asinine requirement to come out of certain recruiters is that you have to be currently employed or they will not consider you for the position. Now, this is probably because they want to mine information out of you about your current work environment in order to sell candidates - not because they actually have any work for you. On the other hand, they might have real jobs, but are prejudiced and ignorant, believing that if you were laid off, you somehow deserved it and are therefore not sufficiently qualified. I have seen many recruiters with this mindset. The reality is that often the mediocre and the yes-men are what are left behind after a layoff. The smart people have jumped ship or are trying to open their own companies. Employers are then left with the not-so-stellar workers who have perfected the art of telling their boss what they want to hear. However, they are not the most qualified people in the world. I guess as long as you are getting a paycheck and it clears, does accomplishment matter?
At any rate, here is what it takes to circumvent such arcane requirements if you are currently not employed:
- A cell phone
- A pager (optional but recommended)
- Caller ID (if you live in the Qwest service area, we highly recommend Privacy Plus, but it's optional)
- PDA (optional, but a nice touch)
- Voice messaging
The first thing you do is set up a professional message on your voice messaging. That is OK if it is your home voice mail; record the kind of message you would use at the office. It is fine to say that you are on pager if it is an emergency, but don't say what the number is as you would with work voice mail. Many people do work from home now at least a day or two a week; this makes you sound as if you are in that same situation and therefore desirable. You do not want telemarketers and the rest of the Great Unwashed paging you though. On your resume, which you have listed on all the major boards, and which you refresh weekly, you list home phone and pager, but not cell. Now recruiters are going to call you or page you during the day. If they catch you at home, then they will know you are not working. That is what the caller ID is for, so you can answer if it is personal. However, you will want to limit those calls to the minimum, so that recruiters are not kicked into voice mail immediately, or get a busy signal if you have an answering machine. (We advise against answering machines because they create the impression that you are not very technical. Plus, they can fail, unlike voice mail.) You might want to let your friends know to call your cell instead if they want to talk to you during the day. Or better yet, IM you.
All this maneuvering is important; you cannot let a recruiter know you need a job. That will definitely reduce the amount of money they are offering - by as much as $10,000 or more! If possible, check your voice mail using the cell phone to dial into the number. Remember, you are not supposed to be at home! Write down all the messages and pager numbers in a notebook or in that PDA. About 10:00 AM, or at 3:00 PM, you can go into the laundry room in the basement (concrete block walls can give a hollow sound, like a stairwell at work, experiment first by talking to a friend) or into the stairwell in your apartment building and briefly return one or two calls using your cell phone, never your home phone! Do this only rarely; not every day. You are on a quick break and have to head back to work. Be careful if you have pets or your neighbors have pets - nothing destroys the illusion like a dog barking right in the middle of your phone call. If you have small children, continue to put them in day care if you can. About 11:30 AM to about 1:00 PM, go to a restaurant, fast food place, Starbucks, or any other public place like that and return the morning's calls. You want to create the impression that you're out at lunch and have to go back to work soon, so say that you can only talk for a little bit - you have a meeting at 1:00 or something like that. If they call in the afternoon, do not return their calls until after 6:00 PM - the later the better. You have to create the impression that you drove home from work, had dinner, then listened to voice mail messages. Return those calls around 9:00 or 10:00 PM if possible. Returning calls after 6:00 PM is the only acceptable time to use your home phone to call recruiters.
When you finally do get in touch with a recruiter, and they want to set up an appointment, claim that you have a hectic schedule, so you would prefer a very early morning appointment (i.e. somewhere in between 7:00 - 8:00 AM) a lunchtime appointment (11:00 AM - 1:00 PM), or an evening appointment (5:00 PM onwards). Ask if they can meet with you on Saturday. Not only does this show that you "care" about your work obligations (and that you have them), it frees you up to use your daytime hours applying for jobs. In the case of an actual employer wanting you to come in for a job interview, try to target those times, but be flexible and graceful about it if you cannot get them. They are the real deal, and they will not have the time or inclination (mostly) to pry into your situation the way recruiters make it their business to do. Dress in a nice work outfit to visit recruiters - not interview suit nice, but I have a meeting and my boss's boss will be there nice. If you have a handheld, it is a realistic touch to add some fake meetings complete with reminder alarms, one of which might so happen to go off toward the end of your little chat with the recruiter. (Use this effect sparingly.) When asked what kind of notice you will need to give, tell them you will need to give two weeks. (Extra little touch: wear a badge reel or clip with old inoperative electronic access card on it clipped to your lapel. It is even better if the card only has the manufacturer logo on it and not the name of the company or your picture - generics are better than specifics. Specifics can trip you up.)
Things to watch out for:
- If they want you to fax an offer letter back to them - do it from home only if after hours. During the workday, go to a downtown copy shop (or one close to where you allegedly currently work) and pay to use theirs. Do not do it from a supermarket or a friend's work. That could raise red flags.
- If they want to call your work for a reference or talk to your supervisor - no one does this. They are trying to call your bluff. Make sure your references know what they are supposed to say. Tell the recruiters that you do not want your current employer to know that you are looking for another position, but if they need to talk to someone about the quality of your work, they can contact your references. Most places will can you if they know you are going to quit; someone on the up-and-up wouldn't put you in this position.
- If they want to see a pay stub from your job to verify your pay - either this is a bluff or this is the kind of company you do not want to work for. Blow off the request, and keep looking; this opportunity is not going to pan out.
- Returning a recruiter's calls too quickly or sounding too eager when you do - only return those calls during the specified lunch-like breaks or after alleged business hours. It does not matter how urgent the messages sound. Recruiters always sound that way; they are trained to. Try to return calls during your "break" periods only rarely if at all, because it is hard to get off the phone quickly, as if you had actual work to return to.
- Returning e-mail during the day about a job from a POP3 account - most people only have these set up on their home machines. It is unlikely that you would have it set up on a laptop and that you would have this laptop with you at work. This could be a giveaway that you are not where you say you are. Use a Yahoo or Hotmail account for your job searching. Using web-based e-mail means you could be applying for jobs from work. The important thing is to not do anything that runs counter to that impression.
- Innocent questions - either decide that you are employed at an imaginary new company with a suitably generic name, or that you are still at your old job. Depending on how easy it would be for someone to find you at your old job would be the factor influencing this decision. On your way into or leaving the meeting with the recruiter, they will casually ask if you had a long drive or how the traffic was. They are generally just making casual chitchat to break the ice. You need to think about what your situation is supposed to be before these encounters occur so that you know whether or not to say things like, "Well, it's only 10 minutes from here, and traffic wasn't bad". If they seem to be grilling you, they probably caught you in an inconsistency earlier. Cut your losses and go elsewhere if you think you have been busted.
It takes a lot of planning and effort to pull this off, but it is worth it. Here is a breakdown of your expenses (if you went the whole hog) versus your payoff:
Expenses over a three-month period:
- Cell phone - $50/month x 3 = $150
- Pager - $30/month x 3 = $90
- Phone service with caller ID and voice mail - $50/month x 3 = $150
- PDA - $400
- Fast food lunches or lattes - $4/day x 5 x 4.3 x 3 = $258
- Total - $1,048
Amount by which a recruiter would drop the offer if they knew you were not currently employed:
You do the math.
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